Calling this oil change procedure idiotic, well, to let you know, I work for 15 years already in the Alberta oil sands as a Heavy Equipment Technician, and servicing and repairing the various types of heavy mining equipment, mostly the Caterpillar 797A, B, F, 793, Komatsu 930, 980 (with Cummins engines, by the way), it's a normal procedure here when doing the oil changes to perform the so called Dry Starts, which in fact is cranking the engine a few times before starting it. Another thing, we have the ability to fill the whole engine through the newly installed oil filters, there's a quick connect before the oil filter housing, and all the 200-450 litres of oil go into the engine through the oil filters, filling them up in the process. One more, all the engines here have pre-lube pumps, and they kick in first when you turn the key to start an engine, they build up the pressure in the oil system, so you can have a safe start.
And most, around 90%, of these engines here run without failure to around 25-30 thousand hours, then get swapped, just as a precaution not to take any chances of a catastrophic failure, while the oil samples come good during all these long hours of hard work.
So there you go, there's average, good enough service procedures, and there's better, engineered by smart people and proven by time and real life in hundreds and thousands of engines.