So you're telling me you weekly had someone lock their fob in the vehicle, someone broke the window at random, and drove off with it? I'd suspect insurance fraud if someone told me they left their fob inside the vehicle while it was locked and unattended and someone just happened to bust the window and take it. Thieves bust windows to take items left in plain view, and I can see if you left the fob in a cup holder or something, but to break in on just the off chance there is a fob hidden inside? I'm calling BS.
If you did 30 years I'm sure you remember the metal keyed GMCs. There wasn't one in town without a busted column and a history of 2-3 steals. Then it trickled down to the hood and became a rock rental. Today it's the Kias that you can steal with a USB drive vs the Chevys you could steal with a screwdriver.
Well, you've been given multiple "irregular" options to avoid the honk. We're kinda deep into 1st world problems here.
If your pants are so tight you can't get a fob in the pocket, the fob may not be the problem. Ask your wife to help you buy pants that fit and call a locksmith to get your locks keyed the same. See? I'm a problem solver, it's what I do.
But I get it. Cops only complain about two things. When things change and when things stay the same.